Wednesday, July 2, 2008

So, this zucchini walks into a bar...

This squash came from BEYOND. I mean our garden. Look at it.

Zukes!


**Insert your favorite phallic joke here - come on, you got one. If you claim to be raised in a nunnery, then ask your knucklehead brother. If you are not blessed with a bro, then consult your inappropriate co-worker who always has his hands in his pockets. He'll hook you up real nice.**

This is the fourth such zuke of this size our garden has produced. The cherry tomato has been added to give you a sense of scale.

**Insert your second-favorite phallic joke here. You know, that one that is really only slightly funny, but after a few drinks can get someone to shoot beer out of their nose.**

What does one do with such a vegetable? One eats a lot of freaking squash, that's what. That's why I was ultra-ecstatic to see this recipe for Zucchini Strand Spaghetti posted by Deb over at Smitten Kitchen. I would show you pictures of my end result but clicking over and checking out Deb's pictures is what will really tempt you to try this.

I have many a recipe bookmarked, favorited, and starred from SK, but this recipe has two things going for it. First, I already had all the ingredients in my kitchen/garden. This is a major score since I am not one to stock up on food. (In the event of a nuclear holocaust, I will be rationing canned crab meat and paprika amongst myself and the Chihuahua for eight weeks). Second, I got to use a fancy tool. You might have one of these yourself, if you have attended one of those kitchen "parties" hosted by one of your "friends" and guiltily flipped to the cheapest item in the catalog (no, not the citrus peeler or garlic press - you bought those last time). This recipe will utilize your... **trumpets,**.... Julienne Peeler. **APPLAUSE**

I was able to execute this very easily, which means you can, too. Two things I did a little different: I used whole wheat angel hair instead of spaghetti. And secondly, I took the pan of olive oil off the heat before I added the garlic. I worried I would burn it. The end result is long strands of zucchini mixed in with the pasta. So you stick your fork in and twirl it around and who knows what ends up in your mouth.

**Insert your favorite fellatio joke here. Don't worry. Your mother isn't paying attention. And if she is anything like my mom, she would be damn proud.**

9 comments:

robayre said...

Big fan of Smitten Kitchen too. I can't remember where I saw it linked, but this was the first recipe that I ever found from there: http://smittenkitchen.com/2007/05/my-kingdom-for-a-glass-of-milk/
I haven't actually tried it yet, but it is something I will do eventually.

sheasy said...

Homemade OREOs? In-con-ceivable!

My blog reader starred items are probably half SK recipes.

Bird said...

That is one terrifying vegetable. I'd make a joke if my mind hadn't just gone completely blank...

bob said...

would you mind if i came over and just hung out by the garden a few hours a day, just on the of chance that, well, you know what i mean.

Sara said...

haha. I'm jealous! Awesome post!

Chelise said...

Thanks so much for nice comments on my blog!

That's quite an impressive zuke. Ha!

Walk in the Woods said...

Thank you for the medicine of laughter!

I have a story a gift given to cranky co-worker involving an overgrown zucchini and D batteries . . .

marshiemallows said...

that's really HUGE! lol

180/360 said...

Man... your mom sounds cool!

The only thing I've made out of zucchini is bread and I don't think I can make an jokes out of it because it was probably on store-bought veggie viagra anyway...

I will definitely have to check out this recipe. I haven't visited SK in awhile!

Now if only I could get zucchini to grow in the desert... (don't think I haven't tried.) ;)